Would someone please Chris Daughtry that I don’t care if he goes on tour or not! Either way no one in their right mind would buy his new (or old) album. Maybe if he sang something that didn’t sound like he had a guitar shoved up his ass while he was gargling a mouth full of gravel I’d give him a second first chance. What a chenozzle!

The name of Weezer’s new album is Raditude. Are they joking? No. What the hell kind of name is that? Then something occurred to me, how could any new album by Weezer not be called Raditude? They started down this path long long ago. Le sigh.

Are you ready for Tron Legacy? Yeah, me neither.

One of these things is gayer than the other -- I’m just not sure which one it is.

Exhibit A:

Diesel has a new line of watches called, and I kid you not: SuperBadAss. Based on this horseshoe shaped metal monstrosity I would venture SuperDumbAss would be a more appropriate name. [via Boing Boing)

Exhibit B:

I take it back, clearly this is hands down the gayer of the two. Peter Andre’s got Flava!

Clearly AM/PM was ripping off Starbucks’ summer promotion. Fail!

Could someone please explain to me what in gay hell a Strawberry Banana Iced Latte is?

[Photo taken outside the local Taco Bell]

If you added bacon to this you’d have something Americans would really go for!

I love the Muppets and I love GaGa but… what the hell?

I know a certain pig who will NOT be pleased.

When I went to a live taping of Rita Rocks, a comedy which airs on the Lifetime network, I got way more than I bargained for. I expected to see a live taping of a television show and what I actually got was a glorious evening with Allan. For those who have never had the pleasure, Allan is the warm-up ‘comedian’ who essentially wrangles the studio audience into submission during their spirit breaking and gluteus numbing four hour journey into television hell. I don’t think I ever appreciated the talent of an exceptionally funny stand-up comedian until I was unlucky enough to spend two hundred and forty minutes with a dreadfully bad one.

My opinion of Allan didn’t appear to be held by the majority. The others in the audience seemed to hoot and holler and immensely appreciate the time they were spending with him. They got free t-shirts and often stood up to individually to show off their own special talents. After watching a young British spectator fold her ears back I found myself longing for the sophistication of Barnum and Bailey. If I wanted to see a side show I would go to the circus. By the time Allan began prank calling people’s elderly grandmothers the whole event had devolved into chaos.

In between Allan’s performances, the cast and crew of Rita Rocks filled our time with the taping of a television show. They dutifully performed their scenes and the audience dutifully laughed when prompted. Basically, we were being used for the live laugh-track they were recording and were often encouraged to laugh at the same jokes over and over again. This was a task I detested, but again, I seemed to be in the minority on this. The rest of the studio audience seemed all too happy to generate fake laughter on command. They were incredibly eager to do their part to make art; the problem is, we weren’t being paid for our role in this production. Someone call AGVA (American Guild of Variety Artists) because I think we need a contract.

All told we spent about 40 minutes total with Rita and much more time with the warm-up comedian. To say the event was misrepresented would be a gross understatement. I suppose there is a reason Allan has the job he does and it’s clear he won’t be getting a one-man show anytime soon. Oh wait, he already has one, you can catch his live show Friday nights in Studio City on Stage 13. The tickets are free but the cost to your soul is incalculable.