Rawk!

Hawaii Day 7 & 8: windward side of the Island; Tropical Farms; Lost, Fantasy Island and 50 First Dates; Matsumoto Shave Ice; More McDonald’s; Polynesian Cultural Center

Hawaii Day 6: Hilton Hawaiian Village; Jane’s weird food photography fetish; Dole Plantation; the villa in Haleiwa (North Shore) where we spent the next 5 days.

Hawaii Day 5: Waikiki, Hilo Hattie, Zippy’s (again – check out that dessert), La Mariana Sailing Club (the very last of the tiki bars on Oahu.

Hawaii Day 4: Snorkeling at Hanauma Bay; Lunch at Zippy’s (check out the dessert); The Duck Tour (Manalua Bay & Diamond Head); Ala Moana Center (Shirokiya & the Sears Food Court (wtf Sears has a food court????))

Hawaii Day 3: Getting ready; The Outrigger Reef Hotel; Senator Fong’s Plantation; McDonald’s Taro Pie; Pearlridge Mall

Hawaii Day 2: The Aloha Stadium Swap Meet, The USS Arizona Memorial and the last picture is the view from the Best Buy parking lot.

Pictures from day 1 in Hawaii. The airport, the hotel room and Top of Waikiki Restaurant.

More bad porn hair and a plush-toy bonus! File this under “Boys Are So Stupid”. First of all, the windswept cheap-ass Zac Efron disaffected Emo hair is revolting. Get a real hair style dammit! Second of all, it’s okay to love your teddy but it’s not okay to love your teddy.

Click here for the completely gratuitous NSFW version (if that’s your thing).

A big-screen version of American Gladiators is in the works.

Dear God,

Why?

Thanks,

Jon

I know I have seen you somewhere before… oh wait… now I recall where!
I’ve seen you at the nude beach.

I thought you seemed overly tanned.
How would Emily Post tell me to handle this situation?

A surreal video from Matt and Kim. So odd and the last 10 seconds were a surprise.

You always knew, deep down inside, if you sent a famous person a fan letter (or even a normal letter *smirk*) they would never see it. Well, here is an engrossing little article confirming that gut feeling: Where Fan Mail Goes to Get Answered.

And to think I was this close to licking a stamp and sending off a passionate diatribe to Sandra Bullock. Looks like that’s one for the shredder. Heh.

I can’t move away from here. I like it. I have a hair dresser and a mechanic so it’s official, I’m in for the long haul. But oh how I long to be closer with my Seattle family. My mom is threatening to move here again – I really wish she would – but I kinda don’t believe her. She threatens to move every year and so far she’s a no-show. She always finds an excuse to delay or change her mind or some such thing – and I totally get it. Change is hard and moving your life is a huge deal – I mean, it wasn’t just two sentences back I said I was in for the long haul so I completely understand.

Frankly I wish they were all near by. I have all these awesome siblings I never see and a couple I never (and I do mean never) even talk to: I have a brother (of sorts) in Portland and he ignored me on Facebook. Ouch. Dick.

Ayhoo I am just the littlest bit lonely. I need some friends or family that I am close too that at least live remotely near by. I always look forward to visits from the G’monts or the sibs and ‘rents and my shlister-in-law. I am not due for a visit from any of them for a long time. Suck.

As we all know, the world revolves around me, so would you people please get off your lovely asses and come and visit moi? That includes you Matty and Katie and Chris and Dylon (who won’t even acknowledge I exist – what a d-bag). Get a move-on.

kthxb.

Leif Garrett called…

This feathery fluffy shaggy mane has a calming effect on me. Ahhhh, zen.

Click here for the full monty (NSFW). BOIOIOIOIOIIIIIING!

This list of the 10 greatest mall set action sequences in the history of film, is pretty good. The inclusion of Eight Legged Freaks (a supreme guilty pleasure), Back to the Future and Dawn of the Dead make me quite happy. However, the rest don’t do too much for me… and the number one pick is just down right baffling.

Question? Where was Paul Blart: Mall Cop? Why wasn’t it on the list? For the record, PB:MC, which more than surpasses its title, is worth a look. Roger Ebert says the PG-rated film is “as slam-bang preposterous as any R-rated comedy you can name. It’s just that Paul Blart and the film’s other characters don’t feel the need to use the f-word as the building block of every sentence. They rely on the rest of the English language, which proves adequate.”

Both Jane and I agree, it’s sweet and unreasonably funny. Wow I really went down a rabbit hole on this post. I started with a link to a top ten list and ended pleading my case for a movie that most people would rather not see. What can I say, I may not have a PhD in film but I know what I like.

Jane (his wife) mentioned in passing the other day that I had seven (count them, seven) different parents involved in my life. This includes step, and adopted and biological and so on. Holy crap! I don’t think I ever counted them before. But seven is the correct number and all of them have had varying degrees of impact on my life. Mostly, but not always, positive.

Two of them surface more often than others: the mothers (queue dramatic theme music). Next would be my three dads (if I wrote a sitcom based on these men’s involvement in my life, it would be five minutes long and could only be aired on Showtime – and even then I’m not sure they’d allow it). Finally there are the step-biological parents; what ever that means.

Confused? You should see my tangental family tree of dotted lines a loop-dee-loops when we start to evaluate my seven (yes there are also seven) siblings. Alas that’s a story for another time…

This is revolting. Don’t click here – Not Suitable For Work! So if you are a parent and/or sibling of mine I beg you in all seriousness… don’t do it. It’s along the lines of Two Girls One Cup or the Goatse memes. It is not for the faint of heart (or stomach). Yuk.

Now that we have that out of the way, the rest of yous should click away!

Barf!