Christopher Atkinsesque bad/big hair in flagrante delicto – Blue Lagoon style!

His hair is so fluffy and blonde and ridiculous. And why’s he so oily anyway?
You could go to give him a hug (or other illicit activities) and slide right off him.
What’s his stage-name going to be? I vote for Exxxon Valdez.

Howard the Duck has finally arrived on DVD. Rejoice!

Don’t recall why you should want to own this?
Here are 10 Defenses for Howard the Duck.
Oooooh Ducky…

Porn Hair! I can’t get enough of it!

It’s like a fiberglass haystack.

If the NSFW version is your speed, click here to see the whole enchilada.
It’s not really necessary though – his hair is the main attraction!

Delicious Muppetey Goodness!

A blast from the past…

I wonder if they have crab legs?

Here’s a bizarre picture of Brad Pitt in a goggles and a dress.

While pink may be his color, the sequins/fish-scales are a real no no. Doesn’t he know that you have to be size zero to pull that shiz off?

A Marmaduke movie? Really?

Sigh…

Can you believe they banned this billboard for Armani Exchange in Manhattan?

NSFW – Click at Your Own Risk

I swear, what is it about Japanese pop culture that latches on to the god damn weirdest shiz? For instance, they are obsessed with 90s gay porn star Billy Herrington. Apparently Herrington has become an internet meme among Japan’s online community. A clip from one of his videos Workout was posted on Nico Nico Douga, a Japanese video sharing website (it’s like YouTube, only the user comments are superimposed over the videos) and it took off. According to Wikipedia, over 3000 mash-up parody videos of him have been made.

What the hell? It’s more weird than dirty, but still Not Suitable For Work. YouTube video after the jump…

NSFW – Click at Your Own Risk

Ladies and Faggots! I present the only known pink dolphin in the world:

No, it’s not Photoshop, he’s an albino dolphin. Click to learn more.

Fantastic!

Here’s some more from the almighty gayness that is Troy Miller:

R U F U? Not so much. Jane and I just watched Fired Up! For some reason we thought that would be a good idea. There is a lot wrong with this movie. Here’s the short list of what sucked:

1. The characters seems to shout all lines into the camera – even in moments of intimacy.
2. The writing is on par with all those American Pie DVD spin-offs.
3. The male leads are playing 16/17 year old boys but the actors are actually 29 and 32.
4. The women in this film are all emotionally stunted retards.
5. Every word by every character seems unrealistic.
6. What should have ben raunchy and fun ended up being PG-13 and drab.
7. Talentless painfully bad cheer sequences.

Now for the short(er) list of positive things I noticed:

1. Eric Christian Olsen and Nicholas D’Agosto are very likable (and lickable).
2. The movie has some clever fun with gay stereotyping.
3. Silly references to Bring it On – “the ‘Citizen Kane’ of cheerleader movies“.
4. I learned a new phrase: wrangling snooch – the act of trying to get laid.

I advise you to wait for cable on this one. Or just skip it altogether. Aaaaaaaaaand for your viewing pleasure here’s a gratuitous photo of 32 year old Eric Christian Olsen playing a 16 year old.

Hawt.

.

We do not need a remake of Clue. How can you do better than the original? There were two campy 80s movies with ensemble casts so fantastic that they should never be touched. Clue stared Eileen Brennan, Tim Curry, Madeline Kahn, Christopher Lloyd, Michael McKean, Martin Mull, Lesley Ann Warren, Colleen Camp, Bill Henderson and a cameo by Jane Wiedlin (from The Go-Go’s). There is no better comedic ensemble cast anywhere in the universe. Period.

However, there is a 1988 film that’s a close second. It stared Geena Davis, Jeff Goldblum, Jim Carrey, Damon Wayans, Julie Brown, Michael McKean (hey whadyaknow here he is again) and a cameo by Angelyne. Off the top of your head, can you name it? No? Click here for the answer.

Anywhore, again, why are they remaking something that is already great? I know the original has some detractors (that mens you Kevin Smith) but come on, the new one is going to be directed by Gore Verbinski – BARF!

It’s not news a but it’s a delightful consumable none the less: Zac Efron kisses boys.

Ah yes, all is right with the world. Hooray for shirtless wannabe-homos!
Now if Queen Latifah would just come out of the closet already…

PS: I just taught my spell checker how to spell “Latifah“. Not surprisingly, it already knew how to spell ”Zac Efron“.

Hooray!

http://perezhilton.com/tv/index.php?ptvid=c36d3492936e8

The video is meh… but the song (Love, Etc.) is quite catchy!

This is a photo of Justin Gaston, that’s Miley Cyrus’ butt-boy for those who aren’t in the know, and he’s all decked out in the latest fashion and stuff (courtesy of VMAN). Looks like the 80s are here again! He’s all Ralph Macchio meets Jordan Knight and shiz. Hooray for pegged jeans and white tennies… now toss me a pair of Keds and a neon t-shirt cause I am so down.

You need a Fail Whale Onesie.

Rawk.

In the name of Amun-Ra, they are kidding right? No? Oh, well then I guess that begs the question:

Are you ready for Star Trek cologne?

So Jane and I went to Fry’sElectronics on Saturday because I wanted to buy a fancy wireless portable mouse for my laptop. Oh and I got a good one: The Arc Mouse from Microsoft. It’s full size but folds up to be compact for transport. It lacks some of the graceful design elements that Apple puts into their products but it’s still pretty easy on the eyes.

Still, I feel dirty for buying a Microsoft product – maybe I’ll take a Sharpie and blot out the logo on the bottom. Anyway, by the time I left Fry’s, not only did I have a new mouse but I also had a new vegetable steamer, a new thumb drive and DVD storage book. The only thing I didn’t walk out with was my dignity. Damn you Fry’s… damn you and your reasonably priced poorly lit grotesquely abundant merchandise.

I knew I liked Stephen King for more than just his writing. His dislike of Twilight makes me admire his pop-culture criticism too. Also, at least I know that I’m not alone.